One of our members posted a picture to FB today. I commented on it there, and have decided to cross post the entire package here. Please see this picture to get the context for the following commentary.
http://ministers.themonastery.org/albums/photo/view/album_id/3626/photo_id/97794
Yes, let's assume that all problems that occurs in relationships are because the MEN have flaws they must correct. That will fix exactly half the problems.
I think the entire generation of girls that were raised on the movies that came from the Disney studies - once Disney finally realized that targeting girls instead of boys reaped them a much higher revenue overall - could stand to learn that they aren't actually princesses, and that the men in their lives are PEOPLE, and not just props in their personal fantasy of a world that centers on them.
Men don't always treat their spouses with the respect they deserve. There's no denying it, and *i'm* not denying it by anything i say here. But there's an entire sub-industry already devoted to criticizing men for their unending lists of failures in their relationships, but not so much written about the complement, and i think that other side could stand some attention as well.
Almost everything above in the referenced image is true... though the bit about being "God's gift to men" seems to me to be just a restatement of the "Princess delusion" and should be removed. That said, even still the REST of the overall picture's message is at best a half-truth.
I see a lot of these types of posts from women, but never see the analog back from men, and never see any posts from women that exhort their sisters to examine their OWN failings. Why do so many people think that all men/women issues can be solved by focusing 100% of the attention on 50% of the problem?
How many women consider their husband as anything more than just a "good provider" (assuming, of course, that he can FIND a job in today's economy - sigh) and remember that he has his own personality, goals, and aspirations that don't all center on JUST meeting the needs of her and the children? Many women, once their first child comes along, focus ALL their attention on the child and no longer give their husband and/or their marriage the attention he once received. When the wife spends all of her effort on herself and the kids, and the husband is supposed to spend all of his on the wife and kids, exactly who in that equation is worrying about the needs of the husband?
I'm NOT saying this happens everywhere. I've got a wonderful spouse who has demonstrated that she understands that we BOTH count, and who has allowed ME and MY goals to get some of our resources over the course of our relationship. She is a treasure, and i love and appreciate her.
But in my past relationships, and in the relationships i see all around me, i perceive that this is seldom the case. The selfish man who thinks only of himself is an ass, and i have naught but contempt for him. But in turn, i note that some men may finally wake up one day and realize that if they don't start putting their own needs first, no one else is ever going to.
